Season 4, Episode 12: “I’m Considering Moving Across the Country With My Partner. How Hard Is It To Start Over?”

IT’S THE BITCHES GET RICHES PODCAST SEASON FINALE!

That’s right, Bitch Nation. Our twelve-episode season has come to an end and we’re so grateful you’ve stuck with us for it all. And if you haven’t, then you’re dead to us. We value loyalty very highly. Don’t tell us you’re getting your dick jokes about money somewhere else.

This is the episode in which we become the dating advice column we’ve always wanted to be. Enough with this pErSoNaL fInAnCe nonsense! Bring on the marital strife and daytime talk show material! We have strong opinions and we are RIGHT!

Our discussion this week is packed with harrowing financial and relationship decisions. How do you know when you’re ready to move in with a significant other? And what if that means moving 900 miles to a whole different community? How do you start from scratch in a brand new place, with no one but your romantic partner for company?

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Master the Logistics and Etiquette of Moving Out

On a recent episode of the award-winning highly acclaimed scandalous homoerotic merely adequate “moms love it!” Bitches Get Riches podcast, we discussed how to get your first apartment.

It’s an exciting time! You’re moving into your very own place, getting one of your very first Adulthood Merit Badges!

But what do you do when your time in that first apartment comes to an end? In short, how do you handle moving out?

As tempting as it might be to toss the keys over your shoulder and just walk the fuck away, there is definitely an etiquette for moving out.

Don't be like Kermit's evil doppleganger when moving out.

For one thing, it’s best to leave on good terms with your landlord, as you’ll likely need them to be a good reference for another apartment later on. Plus, you really want them to return your security deposit. And that means making your exit from the apartment with all the grace and aplomb of a Shakespearean actor leaving the stage.

(Exit, pursued by bear.)

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S2 E5: "What do I need to know about moving into my first apartment?"

Season 2, Episode 5: “What Do I Need to Know about Moving into My First Apartment?”

It is Bitches Get Riches canon that Kitty and I met when we were randomly assigned roommates freshman year of college. We bonded through the adversity of cohabiting in a forced triple with an infuriating third party who shall forever remain nameless. The two of us shared a bunkbed and ceded one entire half of the room to that creature’s baffling habits and excessive belongings. I won’t go into it except to quote General William Tecumseh Sherman: “War is hell.”

Yet BGR lore rarely tells the end of the story! For after that fateful freshman year, we went on to rent our first apartment together, taking our roommateship to the next level. Nothing tests a friendship like shopping for a shower curtain together.

We survived our fourth-floor walkup with its busted dollhouse dishwasher and coffin-like shower. But more importantly, our friendship survived.

And thus, we feel uniquely qualified to dispense advice on Baby’s First Apartment!

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{ MASTERPOST } Everything You Need To Know About Living Independently for the First Time

{ MASTERPOST } Everything You Need To Know About Living Independently for the First Time

It comes to you in a dream: ethereal voices, echoing through the fog of your resting mind. You toss and turn as you try to decipher their meaning. The voices are unspeakably beautiful, inspiring, gregarious… and it is then you know they are the voices of… the Bitches. And they speak… of living independently for the first time.

For it is they who bless the minds of young wanderers in the Land of Dreams! They who deliver divine inspiration directly to the soul so that upon waking, the listener is fortified with the knowledge to go forth, living independently, and conquer the world.

You strain to hear. You yearn for their wisdom and sage advice. And at last you make out what they’re telling you:

“This is how you adult like a fucking champ…”

Readers, enjoy this masterpost of all our articles on living independently for the first time, so that you may learn to become your very own adult. For it’s the last you’ll hear from us for a while! That’s right: we’re taking our annual two-week summer vacation starting… now!

Don’t worry: we promise to come back better and bitchier than ever!

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Ask the Bitches: I Want to Move Out, but I Can't Afford It. How Bad Would It Be to Take Out Student Loans to Cover It?

Ask the Bitches: I Want To Move Out, but I Can’t Afford It. How Bad Would It Be To Take Out Student Loans To Cover It?

We have a question today from a Tumblr follower. If you don’t follow us on Tumblr, you should! Piggy is one of the Tumblr Deep Ones. She’s been on the platform since its infancy, and she answers tons of reader questions.

Like this one!

I need to move out, but I don’t have any money actually saved up. I do have a job that can cover my monthly costs and still have some left over. So I was wondering just how bad of an idea it is to take out a student loan to get me out of my situation and then immediately work on paying it off.

Ah. A very relatable dilemma.

For most people (and families), housing is the largest item in their budget. Young people spend, on average, a quarter of their income on housing—more than any other age group. Which means that saving money on housing can have an enormous positive impact on your finances. Especially when you’re young.

But is it ever a good idea to strategically spend a lot more than you have to on housing? Spoiler alert: yes, it absolutely can be.

Let’s get into it!

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