Today, I’m talking about grocery store prices.
I chose this topic because I’m worried. Terrible times are ahead. We’ve been writing a lot about politics—and we’ll keep doing so—but it can feel like scream-preaching to the void-choir. We’ve been wracking our brains to come up with nourishing, material strategies to help our followers through the lean times ahead.
Right now, all I want is to give you guys an easy win. If I could use my time and talents to help you folks save $20 a month, I’d be good with that. Groceries are something we all must buy in order to live. So I opened a small investigation comparing prices at a few local grocery stores.
My “small investigation” became the most time- and labor-intensive topic I’ve ever covered for Bitches Get Riches.
This investigation hauled me bodily to the summit of my abilities, then cast me down the mountainside of my own ambition into a boiling, stinking chasm of magmatic insanity.
Do you want to save $20 a month? I’m positive I can help you do it. But there’s a price to be paid. You’ll have to come with me on a journey. A journey from the worst grocery stores in America, all the way to the best.
Casual visitors, turn back! You don’t need to notice deceptive unit pricing at our nation’s largest budget retailers! You can spend your whole life not caring about the product-to-price ratio of frozen pizzas! Swallow the blue pill and sleep forever in ignorant bliss. I don’t judge you; I envy you.
But if you really want to save money on groceries, take a deep breath. Take my hand. Trust me.
We’re going to hell and back for cheap groceries.